Saturday, March 21, 2015

Five Years Later

It's hard to know where to begin a post like this.  Five years.  Five years since the day we said goodbye to our little peanut.  A lot has happened in those five years, it is hard to even begin to tell it all.  We are so blessed.  Beyond anything we could ever imagine, we are blessed. 

Five years ago, the Lord decided that Malachi would be better off in Heaven.  What a lucky child, to never have the hardships of this world weigh him down; to go straight from a mother's loving womb into the arms of Jesus.  I will never understand the why.  That is really not for me to understand.  All I can do is to cherish those precious few weeks that I held him close to my heart. 

Five years.  In those five years we have welcomed two new children into our home.  Those two children have been so precious and healing to my heart.  All three of my children have been.  I praise and thank God for them every single day.

Five weeks ago, we learned that there is another precious child preparing to join our home.  This one is a little bit harder for me to not worry about, since the timing is almost the same as when we lost our Malachi.  These past few days have been an EXTREME lesson in trust and faith in the Lord.  This child has brought me even closer to the Father as I learn even more to depend on him for our future.

Five years.  In those five years, I have cried with many other mothers who have had children go to Jesus.  In a way, that has been healing to me as well.  They may never know how their faith has helped my faith.  One such lady is Kristin Schmucker.  You can read her story here. I cannot even imagine going through what she has gone through, but through it all, she has been an amazing source of encouragement and hope to me.  Her precious daughter Sophia, went to live with Jesus just weeks before she was due to join her precious family here on Earth.  The incredible strength that they displayed has been my inspiration.  She too is experiencing her "rainbow baby" and is due in about a month.  Throughout her journey I have once again been encouraged at her strength.  Thank you from the bottom of my hear, Kristin, for being a godly lady that I can look up to and draw strength from every day!

Five years.  Five years of keeping my precious child's memory alive in my heart.  Five years of loving my children here on Earth.  Five years of God's mercy and grace becoming more and more evident in my life.  Five years that I will never forget, and always cherish.